Should You Argue With a Drunk Person? What To Do When Things Get Rowdy
![Reframe App Logo](https://cdn.prod.website-files.com/60d10433104bca13abce2c13/6524611f0bc6ca7db5aea21b_logo.webp)
Remember the scene in Friends where Monica makes a fancy dinner for a wealthy restaurateur in the hopes of getting a job in an elite restaurant, only to end up fighting him as he rummages through her kitchen, eating all the junk food in sight? The restaurateur is high as a kite, and there’s no use arguing with him — or asking him to hand over the Chex mix and wait for the meal.
Most of us have found ourselves in a situation when a friend becomes stubborn and belligerent after having a few too many. Should you engage in a debate, hoping to reason them back to sobriety, or do you hold your tongue? If you've been down this road before, you know it's tricky. There’s more to the story than anecdotal evidence, though — science tells us there are biological reasons that explain why arguing with a drunk person is often a lost cause.
Before we dig deeper into whether you should argue with a drunk person, it's helpful to understand what happens in the brain of someone under the influence and how those shifts lead to anger.
Alcohol affects the brain in a big way. It slows down the function of the central nervous system, which is why reaction times get longer after a few drinks. More specifically, alcohol interferes with the neurotransmitter gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA), which is responsible for reducing excitability in the nervous system. The result? Lowered inhibitions and a higher chance of arguments.
On the flip side, alcohol inhibits glutamate, a neurotransmitter that normally increases brain activity and energy levels. The result is a decrease in mental and physical activity, slower reactions, and muddled thinking. And, you guessed it, a shorter fuse.
You've likely noticed that your drunk friend isn't exactly Einstein: alcohol impairs cognitive functions, such as memory, attention, decision-making, and impulse control. It's like trying to drive a car with a foggy windshield and flat tires. Once again, this shift makes it harder to see situations clearly, causing arguments to erupt more easily.
In muddling our picture of the world, alcohol also messes with the way our brains interpret and respond to social cues, resulting in overreactions or misinterpretations. Ever noticed how drunk people seem to have a one-track mind? Alcohol can make it difficult to see things in context, leading us to hyperfocus on one aspect of a situation at the expense of everything else.
Then there's emotional volatility. Alcohol can crank up emotions, leading to amplified feelings of happiness, sadness, or anger when we’re drunk. This emotional roller coaster can make it tricky to reason with someone who's had a bit too much.
In some cases, things can heat up even more, leading to aggression. Alcohol tends to lower inhibitions and impair judgment, which can sometimes lead to impulsive and violent behavior.
Neurologically speaking, alcohol-induced aggression is all about the prefrontal cortex (PFC) — the area of the brain responsible for decision-making and social behavior. This is the part of the brain that typically reins in aggressive impulses. However, when alcohol comes into play, the PFC isn't as effective at controlling these impulses, which can lead to aggressive behavior.
Of course, not everyone becomes aggressive when they drink. Genetics, environment, stress levels, and even past experiences with alcohol can play a role in how a person reacts when they're intoxicated.
Even in sober circumstances, arguments are challenging. When you throw alcohol into the mix, you're faced with a hurdle race where the hurdles are on fire.
Arguing involves a high degree of cognitive function. It requires logical reasoning, understanding another person's point of view, and empathy. And remember those cognitive functions we talked about that get muddled when you're drunk? Yep, those are the ones we need to argue effectively.
Navigating through a jungle of drunk debates? Sometimes it feels like you're in a maze without a map. Let's break down the most common types of arguments you might stumble upon:
The short answer: No, it's generally not a good idea to argue with someone who's drunk.
Why? When people are drunk, their cognitive functions are impaired, they may be emotionally volatile, and they're likely to forget the argument the next day. The chances of you getting your point across in a reasonable, effective manner are slim.
Dealing with conflicts involving someone who's intoxicated can be tricky. But there are a few key strategies to help you navigate these rocky waters:
Remember, these tips aren't a guaranteed solution for every situation. If things get out of control or turn violent, your safety should always be the priority. Every person's relationship with alcohol is different, and what works for one person may not work for another.
Let’s flip the script! We’ve talked a lot about navigating arguments with others who've had a bit too much. But what happens when you're the one with a drink in hand and a debate on the tip of your tongue?
While alcohol might give you the liquid courage to address issues or dive into debates, it's essential to remember that it also blurs your judgment and amplifies emotions. Having a game plan and recognizing when you're headed towards an argument can save you from future regrets and ensure your night remains enjoyable. Here's a guide to help you pause and reflect before plunging into the depths of drunken debate:
Apologize when necessary. If you find yourself having crossed the line, it's okay. We're human. The next day, reach out, acknowledge your actions, and apologize if needed. Open communication can mend many misunderstandings and prevent lingering guilt, shame, and regret.
All in all, alcohol and arguments are an explosive mix that often leads to trouble. it's generally not advisable to argue with a drunk person — or to start arguments yourself, for that matter. It's like trying to play chess with a toddler — lots of noise and pieces flying everywhere, but little constructive gameplay.
Instead, using strategies such as deflection and boundary setting is your best bet. Last but not least, it’s also important to know when to walk away — and that it’s okay to do so, especially if safety is at stake.
And if you're looking to change your own relationship with alcohol, know that there are tools and support available to you. You've got this!
1. How does alcohol affect the brain and our cognitive functions?
Alcohol slows down the central nervous system, interferes with neurotransmitters like GABA and glutamate, leading to reduced brain activity and impaired cognitive functions such as memory, attention, decision-making, and impulse control.
2. Why might a drunk person experience heightened emotions?
Alcohol amplifies emotions, causing individuals to feel intensified happiness, sadness, or anger. This emotional surge combined with impaired judgment can lead to overreactions or misinterpretations of situations.
3. What role does the prefrontal cortex play in alcohol-induced aggression?
The prefrontal cortex (PFC) is responsible for decision-making and social behavior. When influenced by alcohol, the PFC is less effective in controlling aggressive impulses, leading to potential aggressive behavior.
4. Is it advisable to argue with someone who is drunk?
Generally, no. Due to impaired cognitive functions and emotional volatility from alcohol, the chances of a constructive conversation are slim.
5. How can I effectively communicate with someone who's drunk and potentially confrontational?
Maintain a calm demeanor, deflect and redirect the conversation, set clear boundaries, use "I" statements, avoid confrontational language, actively listen, and practice patience. If things escalate, ensure everyone's safety.
6. What are the different types of anger someone might display while drunk?
The most common types include passive-aggressive anger, open aggression, suppressive anger, and chronic anger. Each type may manifest differently and require unique responses.
7. How should I respond to someone displaying passive-aggressive anger when drunk?
Stay calm, avoid reciprocating passive-aggressive behavior, and encourage open communication about their feelings.
If you’re considering ditching alcohol yourself, the Reframe app is here for you! While it’s not a treatment for alcohol use disorder (AUD), our app is a steadfast companion, helping you reevaluate alcohol's impact on your life in a science-backed way. Countless people worldwide have found our approach beneficial in redefining their relationship with alcohol. You can do this, and we're here to support you!
Reframe is devoted to arming you with the right information and tools to do more than just get by with less alcohol — we want you to genuinely thrive. We offer daily insights grounded in solid research that unravel the science behind alcohol. Our in-app Toolkit is full of useful resources and activities to help you overcome any hurdles.
Keen to join a global community on a similar journey? Dive into our round-the-clock Forum chat, where you can draw motivation from empathetic people worldwide who know what you’re going through. Additionally, our licensed coaches are always available for some personalized advice and direction.
We are always introducing new features to our app to improve your journey. Meet Melody, our latest in-app chatbot — she's armed with cutting-edge AI tech and is ready to guide you towards a life with minimal or no alcohol. And that's not all! Every month, we host fun challenges like Dry/Damp January, Mental Health May, and Outdoorsy June. Engage with other Reframers or embark on the journey alone – it's your call!
Test out the Reframe app for an entire week at no cost! You’ve got nothing to lose, and so much to gain. Are you set to take charge and discover what life is like without alcohol? Then download our app through the App Store or Google Play today!
Reframe supports you in reducing alcohol consumption and enhancing your well-being.